Sunday 18th February
Pre-production panic
I had decided on 'It's a New Tuesday' as the single release but I spent the weekend panicking about how to arrange the song. Even after exploring reference tracks, I was struggling to have a vision of how the completed song would sound. I was in a spiral of questioning my abilities as a musician and after a message from Becci asking about 'No More Rain' which was written at the Songseeds retreat in September, I decided at the last minute to change the release track to this one as I felt more confident in the song, even if it was just voice, guitar and backing vocals.
No more rain
Songseeds Retreat in September 2023
As I had decided to change my release song at the last minute I looked back at the brief Jill Jackson gave us at the Songseeds retreat. The brief was to write an apology letter, and I felt at the time that this was an apology letter to myself for all the times I feel I have abandoned myself. It was important to me to step out of the narrative of being stuck and this is why the lyrics I'll let the light in became so important, even if I forget every day.
No more rain draft lyrics
No more rain first performance
Verse 1
No more rain...no more
my eyes despair and my heart is sore
dig beneath the surface
dig beneath the surface
don't swallow it down.....again
Verse 2
No more rain...no more
my eyes are clear and my heart is sure
just beneath the surface
just beneath the surface
Chorus
I'll let the light in
I'll let the light in
Bridge
Again ....again
I know that I'm worth it
even when I doubt it
Even when I can't ....can't
I know that I'm still worth it
When I think about you
Chorus
I'll let the light in
I'll let the light in
Verse 3
No more rain...no more
my eyes are clear and my heart is pure
me beneath the surface
me beneath the surface
Chorus (Outro)
I'll let the light in
I'll let the light in
I'll let the light in
I'll let the light in ......again
Similar to the songwriting intensive days we come back at the end of the day to share what we have written. I was incredibly nervous as it had been a long time since I had performed live.
No more rain live performance in Perth
Friday 23rd February
Went to see Nadine Shah perform at Assai Records and although I had heard of her, I didn't know much about her music. I messaged her on Instagram before the set saying how much I was looking forward to seeing her play and that her music has been really inspired me. I had a great time talking to her about being an older woman and artist in the music industry, not only did she remember the message but I also I told her about my single being released on 7th April. She asked me to send it to her when it was released. Since then I have researched more about her work championing mental health and definitely will send her a message when the single is released. I definitely felt a shift in my own perception when talking to her as in the past I would have been apologetic about who I was as an artist and I felt confident about who I am as an artist which is part of the growth I have felt during this course.
Having listened to Nadine Shah's back catalogue it and then reading the article in Music Week regarding EMI North– the Leeds-based arm of the Universal Music UK record company. This resonated with all the lectures that Jayne had been discussing around the future of the record industry.
Tuesday 27th February
I was incredibly nervous about going into the studio to record my vocals as my confidence in my singing wasn't good. I went to see my singing teacher Gillian from McLaren Scott Vocals to help with my phrasing and confidence.
Wednesday 28th February
Recording day
Nervous about the recording, but as I had worked with Ally (albeit online during lockdown) on the production of my album during the Masters and that his speciality was live recording I was excited to see how the gong would sound on the recording. We recorded the gong parts first and this allowed me to settle down as well as I was in my comfort zone, until I looked around the gong to see the prospective Commerical Music students in with Ally and Eve.
I was so grateful for Eve's emotional support on the day of recording. Becci stopped by to record her backing vocals and the time went incredibly fast. We did fve takes of lead vocals and then Eve did her low backing vocals.
It was a great day of recording until I left UWS to broken springs on my car and had to get picked up and got home at 9pm with a hefty £600 bill, which did end the day on a bit of a low note.
Tuesday 12th March
Even though it was very last minute I had asked Cat who was on the PMR to add some vocals and strings, I had sent her a reference track and she absolutely captured what I was looking for. We did this through Bandlab which Becci had introduced me to, this allows collaboration amongst musicians and I found it very intuitive to use. I also asked Caragh to do some backing vocals as she had added live backing vocals at the Songseeds retreat and we record our Podcast 'Beyond the Chord' together. Even though this all happened at the last minute before going in to mix with Lauren, Cat and Caragh's contribution's finished the song ready to mix with Lauren.
Wednesday 13th March
Mixing day
I was so excited to be mixing with Lauren and Novasound due to the issues with my car it was much easier to get to Lauren's studio. I was nervous but I knew I was in safe hands with Lauren. It was great to watch the process of going through each track and reorganising files. I had sent a shared Google folder and also brought my external hard drive in case there were any issues. Going through this process gave me a lot of confidence in deciding between different vocals and I was led by Lauren's advice too when I was unsure. She made the whole process effortless.
Mixing day reflection
As a collaborative team I think we worked really well together, we supported each others ideas, we tried different chord progression building on Cat's initial idea and we all contributed. From the work we did we agreed on a structure for the performance and Chris played piano, I supported Cat with some vocals and Cat sang the lead vocal. We were conscious of creating an atmosphere that told the story of how disconnected we have become from the land. We worked through the chords (see track 2) The structure of the song was BABACB and it was in the key of
Post production
Lauren sent over the first mix of the track and after listening on a few different devices I sent some feedback, which I found quite difficult to do.
"Hi Lauren,
Sorry for the delay in getting back to you. Here are my thoughts and notes - please let me know if this is the correct way to feedback, having never done it before. And also I love the track and what we discussed and how you have shaped it. As you are much more experienced than me I am open to any feedback on my notes below, I am finding it quite difficult to get used to the fullness of the track as I am so used to just voice and guitar and feel it is very loud….but again I think that is just because I am not used to hearing it arranged. I have only really pointed out the tiny things that I noticed on listening …I haven’t gone through and said all the bits I love (because that is pretty much the rest of it).
10s - could the gong be even quieter? it still sounds a wee bit too loud.
39s - my s is super sharp (not sure if that makes sense) would it still sound alright with that out? - the next one at 49 s is much better
51& 58s - screeching sound could we take that out - not sure if it is violin.
1:05 - I love the echo of no more but could we hear more of Eve’s wasn’t sure if it was just that I couldn't hear Eve’s other no more’s
1:25 - my s at the end of the phrase seems a bit harsh - would it still sound alright with that out?
1:45 - gong bit too loud
1:59 - I love the again bits - I wondered if we could have the violins lower in the mix and the bv a bit more at the front? I think even just the melodic violin a bit quieter
3:01 & 3:22 - screeching sound again not sure if it is my ears…
If this is too much to change I totally understand and would still be over the moon even if it is too late to change it."
Lauren came back with a revised version and at the time I was feeling quite stressed with having to go back again and make any changes, I also remembered Lauren saying that outside this course make sure you agree with your producer how many mixes you are allowed.
"Lauren: Here's a revised mix of No More Rain for you.
-
the gong level has been brought down throughout so it's just in there enough to feel the rumble but not overwhelm the track
-
comped together the 'S' sound from a gentler take as there is just unavoidable sibilance on some of them. They're sounding much softer now at 39s and 1:25
-
added all of Eve's 'no mores' back in
-
the 'screeching' sound was just a high frequency from a synth soundscape sound so just took that part out throughout
-
rebalanced the ending to have more BVs and pulled the violin counter melody back a touch. Tidied up more of the breaths in the again section to keep Becci, Caragh and Cat's vocals really tight with yours as well and think that section is sounding strong"
I felt that Lauren had gone above and beyond and didn't want to go back and ask for more changes so I said I was happy with it (even though I wasn't as I couldn't hear the 's' at the end of the surface lines. I should have said to Lauren at the time, however, I didn't so I left it and a few days later it was really upsetting that I felt I couldn't ask for it to be changed. This brought up a lot of old trauma around speaking up for myself and ironically the line in the song 'don't swallow it down again' was written for this kind of situation. This was nothing to do with Lauren, but I felt that I had to say something, even though it was at the last moment and it may have been too late. So I sent Lauren an email.
"Hi Lauren,
I know it is way too late to make any changes and this is more for my sanity and my learning to speak up for myself. Can you hear the S’s in any of the surface bits…I am going insane and not sure if I can’t hear them and not sure if it really matters, but I just wanted to check with you for advice. Didn’t take as much time to listen to the second mix as I was conscious of how much more than 2 hours you had put into it, huge learning curve for me. Just wanted to send this so that I have put my mind at rest."
Post production reflection
This experience will be really useful moving forward as I can confidently go to a Producer and ask for what I want, even though I found the whole process quite stressful, due to old trauma resurfacing, Lauren made the process safe for me and I am really grateful.
Paul did an amazing job mastering it and I was absolutely over the moon with the finished song.
I am so proud of myself and without this course, I know that this single would not have been released.
Post course reflection
It has been an incredibly steep learning curve throughout and even though I feel I didn't quite explain everything I wanted within the report in terms of where I fit in to the music industry, I feel the fact that I had met Nadine Shah and told her about my single and she asked me to send it to her allowed me to realise that I am as valid in the music industry as anyone else. I did send her my single and she has now followed me on Instagram which for me is massive.
I know I didn't really get everything done on the release plan, however, once the report is in I will circle back to the music industry lectures and go through it again.
The experience of this course in terms of not only the single release, but also the bringing to the light of old trauma for release has made a massive impact.
Thank you to all the lecturers and my peers on the course.